Matt and Sean’s Daddy

One thing that lights up the party is the joke cracker, or the joker of the one that can deliver a fast ball joke and everyone cracks up!

Here’s some collection of jokes, diet jokes or Fenphedra jokes if you will that you can probably use in one of those boring christmas party messages you’re attending now. (or you’re probably just sitting at home watching redtube vidoes)

After my husband asked me to help him shed some unwanted pounds, I stopped serving fattening TV snacks and substituted crisp celery.

While he was unenthusiastically munching on a stalk one night, a commercial caught his attention. As he watched longingly, a woman spread gooey chocolate frosting over a freshly baked cake.

When it was over, my husband turned to me. “Did you ever notice,” he asked, “that they never advertise celery on TV?”
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Q: Why did the dumb man snort Nutri-sweet?
A: He thought it was diet coke.

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I’m not fat…

… I’m just short for my weight.

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Q: Why did the dumb man snort Nutri-sweet?
A: He thought it was diet coke.